Was Dustin Lance Black’s Apology for Barebacking Necessary?
Did Dustin Lance Black owe us an apology for barebacking?
The gay news is buzzing with news of gay rights campaigner and Milk screenwriter Dustin Lance Black having his barebacking photos published on the Perez Hilton website, and his apology last week. The photos (and reportedly a video too) were taken three years ago and show Black having unsafe sex with his lover at the time.
Black, who won the oscar for writing the Best Original Screenplay for ‘Milk’ in February, said to E Online’s Marc Malkin,
“…More important than the embarrassment of this incident is the misleading message these images send. I apologize and cannot emphasize enough the importance of responsible sexual practices.“
Barebacking, well so what?
I’m at a loss to see why he needed to apologise, and why there is such outrage at his actions. Let’s be clear about this. Three years ago, Black made a private decision to have unsafe sex with his lover. He was fully informed and knew the health risks of fucking without a condom, and made his legitimate, legal and personal decision to bareback.
But he’s an AIDS campaigner!
Yes, amongst other things. It is true that Dustin Lance Black has been involved in delivering the safe sex message to the gay community, as well as campaigning for gay rights, especially amongst young people. In his Oscar acceptance speech Black talks passionately and movingly about his desire to see true equality for gays across the USA.
For any charge of hypocrisy to stick, it really depends on what message he was giving about safe sex. If he was simply informing of the risks of HIV, and the consequences of catching the disease - and advising condom use in order to prevent it, then I don’t see any hypocrisy. He was rightly enabling personal choice on whether to wear a condom or not - a choice that he himself made.
Even if he went further than that, and strongly campaigned always to wear a condom and never bareback - and that barebacking is wrong - then sure, I concede it looks hypocritical. But even in this instance, should we really judge so harshly?
Which of Us is Perfect?
Dustin Lance Black won an Oscar for Best Original Screenplay for Milk, the film starring Sean Penn
For a start, it is very hard to make an impartial decision on whether to bareback or not! Let’s face it - the temptation to feel skin-on-skin can be overwhelming, and can short-circuit any rational decision making process.
That aside, Black has contributed very significantly to the gay community - not just in his effective gay rights campaigning, but artistically too - including his Oscar winning contribution to the excellent film ’Milk’ - bringing to life the work of the early gay rights campaigner Harvey Milk.
His emphasis on young gay people is particularly important - early damage to self-esteem caused by negativity toward our sexuality can cause lasting psychological damage. Some gay people never overcome these childhood scars. Black has recognised this, and has consistently reached out to make a better world for gay people.
He may have slipped up here, or he may not. Whatever, it is clear that he’s given much more to the gay cause in his life than he has taken. Let’s get off his back. Look at the media, gleefully jumping on the bandwagon and scoffing ‘hypocrite’. Give the guy a break!
As for his apology, well maybe that was another selfless act - it could be that he felt he needed to say sorry so as not to undermine the safe sex message he has campaigned for. Whatever the reason, he didn’t owe anyone an apology.
by David Abrehart
(c) Copyright 2009. All rights reserved.
UPDATE 6 August 2009: Dustin Lance Black sues over bareback photos. More here
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Gay Harry Potter
June 27th, 2009 at 3:18 am
I agree that DLB has nothing for which to apologise, however his sexcapades shed daylight on two pieces of very dirty laundry in nearly every gay man’s closet: 1) raw sex is hotter and 2) straight guys are way hotter.
Do I encourage unsafe sex? Hell no! But I acknowledge it. I don’t attempt to rationlise my own intimate indiscretions with a lot of sanctimonious cant: Dustin Lance it was really hot. Just admit it.
Dustin-Lance’s paramour in his video romp was not a ‘former boyfriend’ but rather some sketchy Az State fratboy cum gay4pay webcam hustler for whom he’d conceived a fancy. For either a considerable fee, or a promise of a part (which he allegedly made to Brent Corrigan, with whom he has also been linked), Dustin-Lance lived out every self-loathing homo’s maddest dream by catching for a straight ‘jock’ and taking his load.
Those of us who are same-sex oriented are so because we like guys. The sad truth is that most ‘out and proud’ gay men are too caught up in their own utter fabulousness to be any good at being guys. We lust after guys, which usually implies straight men.
And lastly I have no problems with Perez Hilton for making this disclosure — I think he was obliged to, in fact. We gladly eat his dish when it’s about Brit or Branjelina. Believe it or not, he was only exercising journalistic ethics by subjecting a ‘gay brother’ to the same degree of scrutiny as he would any other celeb. I have new-found respect for him.